Brillo, cleaning, fibre optic, flash fiction, Friday Prediction, hardware, house, Inspiration Monday, irritant, K Patrick Moody, Kim P Moody, moving, Nissan Micra, Peterkins, scrubbing brush, Talkback, Vim, virgin
It’s all change at the Scratchypen residence. After nearly 13 years in our tiny flat we are moving to bigger premises.
Moving house is not a new thing for us, we’ve done loads of it. Even, on one occasion, cramming everything we had into a Nissan Micra for a rapid departure. But that was a long time ago.
We’ve spent the last week or so packing belongings into boxes, now we are living in a mini warehouse. At the weekend we did a deep clean on the bathroom and kitchen. Well, you got to leave it nice for the landlord, or you won’t get your deposit back. We went in search of some proper cleaning materials. None of this ozone-friendly, protect-the-environment, namby-pamby stuff – we needed to get the place clean. We needed stuff with a black X on it, labelled ‘irritant’!
We found it in Peterkins, our local hardware store. There were Brillo pads, Vim and scrubbing brushes – real scrubbers, like granny used on the front doorstep. We set to and scrubbed the guts out of everything in sight, now it’s all sparkly clean, just like the ‘ping’ in the toothpaste advert.
The downside of moving is transferring the services. Gas and electric meters have to be read, the local council have to be able to grab their tax (damn them!), but worst of all the internet has to be laid on. Our new place doesn’t have the magic fibre opticals so we have to wait nearly a week for the virgins to come and fix it. How will I cope? All that time isolated from the interweb!